justcallmefee | [oom] Dream A Little (Victoria Cays)

Ramon had spent a week in the cells, and she'd visited him every day. Security had let her through the barrier to check on him, but only for a few minutes. It'd been enough to see to it that he had enough pills to keep him set. And a book or seven. (She knows he likes to read, even if he'd never admit it out loud.)

She spent the week sleeping in her flat. Well, not so much sleeping as doing battle with unconsciousness. She'd barely eaten anything at all, and had taken to running like a woman possessed, doing ten miles a day easily. She spent the other hours shadowboxing or working the heavy bag, anything to physically exhaust herself. And in the end, it didn't matter.

Without him here, she had her first run of nightmares in a long time. Once they had their teeth in her, they didn't seem to want to let go. She dreamt of the cold dark hole, of feeling her fingers and toes go numb and grey with gangrene. She dreamt of Michael McBride, laughing as he boarded a helicopter, taking off and trailing a stream of cash behind him over the dull brown rooftops of Dublin.

She dreamt of making love to Ramon, of being beneath him, lost in that slow coiling ecstasy, when his body began to shift, grow heavier above her. She felt her hands smoothing over the muscles of his back, feeling his skin turn into thick black fur. She dreamt of the panther's jaws against her throat, felt the blood dripping off his teeth. She felt the caress of his hands turn into the slice of his talons, felt him sink those teeth into her throat, felt her body jerk like a rag doll as he tore into her flesh. That dream made her wake up screaming.

She dreamt of kissing his younger self, of looking into his dark eyes and seeing the depths of her heart there, reflected back to her. A moment of real hope. She dreamt of watching that light go out, and seeing him smirk at her, cold and distant.

She dreamt of holding the infant Emanuel in her arms while he slept, her fingertip stroking his cheek. In that dream, he slowly became transparent and faded away, leaving her holding nothing but an empty blanket.

So by the time he'd served his week and was done, his desire to return to the island was very much welcome. She was drawn thin and tired from lack of sleep. All she wanted to do was swim and doze on a beach towel in the brutal summer sun.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

latino_menace

He feels grey. The cells in Milliways are boring and he's had more than his share of pain to keep him company. The books, and her visits, have livened the days a little but the pills have knocked him out for much of the rest of it.

Now though, he's feeling a bit more alive. Just being in the sun helps. But things aren't right still and it's nowhere more obvious than in the lines on her face, the way her skin is pulled even more tightly than normal over her muscles.

'You need to eat something.'

From:

justcallmefee

She turns her head, one finger lowering her dark shades so she can look into his eyes. A soft smile crosses her features.

"I had toast with coffee this morning."

That was hours ago.

From:

latino_menace

'Then its time you had something proper.'

He's not...actually offering to make it, as him cooking would probably mean she carried on starving. But he won't stop nagging until she does.

From:

justcallmefee

She reaches out a hand, the backs of her knuckles grazing down his jaw.

"Are you worrying about me over there?"

From:

latino_menace

'You look thin.'

He'd use the word concern rather than worry but no matter. She's skinny as it is but this is taking it to new levels.

From:

justcallmefee

Her brow furrows a bit.

"Yeah?"

She sees that concern in the lines of his face. It's -- touching.

"Just at my fighting weight." He thinks she might be going to argue the point, and she thinks about it for a moment. If he's noticing it, then maybe he's right. She sits up and reaches for her wrap. When you're on a private island, sunbathing requires no suit at all.

"All right, come on. Maybe you can help me work up an appetite later?"

From:

latino_menace

'You need to ask?'

Duh, Fiona.

His hand goes to his crotch, with a smirk.

'About time it got another good workout. Need to see if he's back to his fighting weight.'

Another stretch of forced abstinence has not gone down well with him.

From:

justcallmefee

She's shaking the sand out of her towel and folding it up, grinning and then laughing outright when he grabs himself.

"Baby, you have nothing to worry about. Believe me. Come on. How does burgers sound?"

She offers her hand to him.

From:

latino_menace

'Whatever.'

Its food. It'll taste good. He's not particular. So he gets up and takes her hand, shaking sand out of the leg of his shorts.

'And then I'm getting in the jacuzzi, I think. I fucking hate sand. And you're coming with me.'

Just FYI, Fi.

From:

justcallmefee

She tilts her head and smiles at him, trying for his sake to shake off the black mood that's been haunting her for the passed few weeks.

"More than one way to drown our sorrows, I suppose."

She makes them a quick lunch, perching at the end of the bar to eat, washing each bite down with a swallow of beer. She eats the whole burger, a rarity for her, but then, he's watching to make sure she eats every bite.

"There. Better?"

She doesn't sound put out, not in the least.

From:

latino_menace

'Yeah.'

He leaves half of his but that's not unusual. He tends to get bored halfway through a meal. He's on his second beer though, and toys with the glass as he looks at her.

'What's been up? You've been different since I got out.'

From:

justcallmefee

She meets his gaze, and for a moment, she just looks at him.

"Nightmares came back while you were gone. Bad ones."

There was a time, not that long ago, she wouldn't have answered his question so directly. But things are different now. And she's trying to live up to that promise, that bit of hope.

From:

latino_menace

He blinks but his face is mostly expressionless.

'I didn't know you got them.'

She's generally seemed to sleep pretty well, as far as he knows.

From:

justcallmefee

She looks down at her hands, and nods, looking younger for just a moment.

"It's been awhile since I've had a bout. Guess I was due."

And the lack of sleep, and stress of the passed few months didn't help.

From:

latino_menace

'Do you remember them?'

Not that he wants to drag them back up, but he's curious as to what they're about, if she remembers.

From:

justcallmefee

Again, a small nod.

"Flashes, yes. Some of them are old friends."

She takes a long sip of her beer, her gaze distant.

"Sarajevo. Spent a week chained in a metal box in the middle of winter."

From:

latino_menace

He contemplates her for a minute, wondering how to best pull her out of this. Or whether its better to let it run its course.

He doesn't know. He's crap at things like this.

'Why? What happened to get you there?'

From:

justcallmefee

Her shoulders rise and fall.

"Got nicked by the wrong side, carrying a sniper rifle. Better than the alternative, I guess."

She hadn't been sent to one of the rape camps, or ended up faceless in a mass grave. All a matter of perspective in the end. She gives another head shake and waves it off.

"I dreamt about you. Making love to you, and having you turn into the cat. Devouring me alive."

Literally.

From:

latino_menace

'...oh.'

He's not sure what to say to either one of those pieces of information.

'It was just a dream, Fi. I'm not going to turn into a cat and kill you. And you're not going back into any more boxes.'

From:

justcallmefee

She looks back into his face and gives him a soft smile.

"I know. Don't worry, caro. They never last."

She knows better than to share the dream about his son.

That one's not going away any time soon, she knows.

"I just have to get back into the swing of things. Staying busy helps."

From:

latino_menace

He looks at her for a long moment, then slips off his stool and comes to put his arms around her, holding her against him for a minute.

'Then lets hit the jacuzzi. I can think of a few things to get you back into the swing.'

And busy. Definitely busy.

From:

justcallmefee

She melts against him, arms sliding around his neck. She buries her face in his throat and just breathes him in for a long moment. He can feel her holding him tight.

She's hard core, tough as nails, most of the time. But in the end, she's only flesh and blood.

"Yeah, that sounds good," she breathes against his jaw.

From:

latino_menace

It's been a difficult couple of months for both of them. He's happy to just hold her for a bit. He quite likes it, sometimes, just getting to be still like this.

But he also wants her. He always wants her. So after a moment of peace he grins quietly and picks her up, swinging her into his arms easily and carrying her out and down the steps to the tub.

From:

justcallmefee

It's funny that. She always wants him. Always.

So when she feels him shift, her grip at his neck tights and she gasps, laughing under her breath as he carries her.

Her teeth fix on his earlobe and she sighs, murmuring softly in Gaelic against his skin.

From:

latino_menace

He's only in shorts and she's only wearing a wrap so there's no delay. He just walks them straight into the hot water and puts her down, pushing her hair back before taking her face in his hands and kissing her firmly.